We've recently partnered with Spreadshirt to print all of our shirts as well as handle our payment processing, shipping, and after-sales service. This partnership allows us to keep our prices low and the quality high. More importantly, it allows us to do less work and take more naps. And if you say you don't like naps, you're a no-good liar.
Hells no! Jerkass shirts use a much nicer printing method known as plot printing. Instead of using digital transfers to convert bitmaps into designs, like Cafe Press, Spreadshirt allows me to use their magnificent machines to apply highly durable richly colored inks onto their fabulous fabrics.
C'mon. We wouldn't do that. Plot printing takes a thin layer of polyurethane color material then precisely cuts it out with a crazy vector driven cutting machine. Then we heat press the color material until it fuses to the fabric of your soon-to-be tee shirt. Why do I use it? This is why:
How dare you? I don't think I like your tone. We offer a number of different shirt brands for each design and all of the them are of superior quality. I pinky promise.
We can print our designs on all sorts of different apparel. If you're looking for a shirt you don't see listed, just let us know and we'll do our darndest to hook you up.
Wow. You sure do have a lot of questions. Your items are printed by hand and usually ship within 2 business days after receipt of payment. Please note that we have no impact on the actual delivery time, and that calculation of delivery times are only estimates. Click here to check the status of your order.
Note: Alaska, Hawaii, Puerto Rico, and APO addresses are generally delivered within 9 mailing days after shipment, but these locations can have delivery times up to 20 mailing days. Premium and Next Day Air Saver cannot deliver to P.O. Boxes or APO addresses. If you enter a P.O. Box or an APO address for these shipping options, we will ship your order via our Standard shipping option.
Sorry, we no longer accept bags of nickels. But we do accept Visa, Mastercard, American Express, and Paypal. We also take debit and check cards as long as they are associated with a major credit company.
You do not have to pay U.S. sales tax. Hells yeah. USA! USA! Unfortunately, customs and countries outside of the USA, sometimes place a steep tax on packages arriving in countries across the world from the USA. As we cannot control these taxes, there is no way to make them lesser. However, we have dropped shipping costs to help reduce some of the costs for these such instances.
After submitting your order, you will receive a confirmation e-mail from Spreadshirt. This confirmation is sent within minutes after an order is placed. If you do not receive this confirmation, it is most likely due either to technical problems or an error in your e-mail address (e.g. typo). In this case, please e-mail email@example.com to let them know that you haven't received your order confirmation e-mail. Be sure to provide your full name, e-mail address and street address used in the order as well as the order date.
Um, ok... here is the bad news. Remember that nifty "plot printing" I mentioned as my fancy new printing method? Well it turns out there is one drawback to using this system. Each shirt is printed on demand and made to order, we don't keep any stock and each shirt is treated as a custom beautiful unique snowflake. Because of this fact we just can't accept most returns. Now if we screw up an order, then of course we will make things right. But if you decide you would prefer a different size, or you just change your mind about your purchase I'm afraid we just can't help you there. Yeah, I know, I'd prefer it the other way too.
But... a new order can be cancelled or changed without any problem only if the production process has not yet begun. To find out whether your order has been processed, log into Your Spreadshirt online where it is possible to view the status of your order. The link to your order status page can be found in your order confirmation email. If your order is labeled "wait" or as "new", you will be able to cancel your order. If you would like to change your order, please contact Spreadshirt customer service by phone before your order begins production. Once it begins production, you can no longer make any changes. You can reach us at 1-800-381-0815, Monday-Friday 8:00am-7:00pm EST.
After your order has been shipped you will receive an e-mail from Spreadshirt confirming the shipment. If - whatever the reason - you feel that your order has not been received in the proper timeframe, please contact firstname.lastname@example.org. We kindly ask that should this be the case, you let us know no later than 6 weeks after ordering.
Damn you Al Gore! Your interwebs aren't working. We're aware of issues with certain browsers and we're looking into it. If you're not already, we recommend using the Firefox or Chrome browser when ordering.
Well of course you do. Jerkass tees can now be found in
garbage dumpsters fine retailers all across Wisconsin and the rest of these great United States. Our network of partners distribute Jerkass tees under our classier and more cosmopolitan Franks & Beans label. Learn more.